Cyclical Living

The magic in the silence

There can be resistance to the restful, quiet nature of winter. As in menstruation, this season can be a time of deep rest, introspection and manifestation. But just to be clear, this doesn’t have to look like doing nothing (though the delicious luxury of having nothing to do but read a smutty fantasy novel isn’t lost on me).

When you’re an entrepreneur or an ambitious type of human, then it can be challenging to stop. There’s joy and dopamine in setting and crushing goals. The more masculine energy of hustle culture is celebrated, even when burn out can follow. So what does a winter season look like in business when financial stability and consistent income are needed?

If I’ve learned anything from my time in real estate (a business that can be quite seasonal and fluctuating), it’s that what you do now will show up in your business in six months. That’s where consistency can and should come in. The fruits of our labour don’t equate to overnight success. Future clients sometimes need to hear about your services or offerings several times before they’re ready to invest in you. What you do now turns into results later.

So let January be a bonus month. Let winter become the season to build solid foundations and gain clarity on your direction. If you know what you want, then yes, make a plan and go for it. But notice where the intention of that goal or desire lives. Are you feeling behind because of what your peers are doing? Are you unhappy in your day-to-day and take action out of fear versus knowing? Are you listening to your own body and intuition, instead of consuming the New Year, New Me content online?

There’s also such beauty and power in the silence, the unknown.

If you actually sit with yourself, tune out the noise and opinions of others, and connect with your own inner wishes and desires, what does that healthy, gorgeous inner voice tell you?

It’s something I have been exploring myself this January. In the space and the quiet, I have the capacity to notice the lessons and hear the downloads from the Universe. Let me share a couple of examples from my own personal experience.

Firstly, I ended last year in a unique-to-me situation where for the first time in my life, I didn’t have a role model or someone I aspired to be. There was such freedom and fear in this realization. The freedom in accepting I don’t need to be like anyone else and fear in not knowing how to move forward and create goals without a clear direction.

There’s a woman in my sphere who is doing exactly what I used to think my dream business would be, and it’s rattled me to notice that’s no longer my deepest desire and to move on. To witness her apparent success and passion, and acknowledge that’s never been my truth. That the “dream business” I envisioned didn’t become reality because it was never meant for me.

This January, I met another woman who is so passionate about another element of my previous job description. I’m noticing how the Universe is stripping away these pieces of my former identity, things I could do because I’m smart and multitalented, but things I never loved doing. Being around her and seeing how her whole body lights up talking about this topic initially made me feel so self-conscious and inadequate, but I just needed a big exhale and physical shake to release this old piece of me.

The fear is very present. It’s one thing to accept these careers are better suited to others and know in my heart it was never my soul work, and another to know where that leaves me. I am feeling quite bare, but I know I wouldn’t have had the mental space to hear and realize these things and not succumb to a panic spiral without this pause of winter.

The second area where I’m noticing the effects of winter are my offerings, specifically my group mentoring program. Initially, I had planned to start back in January. Now, listening to my body, it’s March. I know I need time to download what the first season felt like and to know how I want to evolve it for next time. To move it, inch by inch, closer to what I dream about.

Morning pages have become a dedicated practice once again, and with them come new frontiers. I’m constantly surprised and inspired by my own brain and the depths it wants to explore. If I didn’t have this lull in my output, I wouldn’t be listening well enough to hear what I’m fully capable of and I’d be limiting my own creations. Without this season of self-reflection and self-exploration, I would be so easily influenced by the other creators.

It’s wonderful to be inspired by those around you, but sometimes I notice how these external voices limit me. Outside ideas come from outside experiences and perspectives different from my own. They are created within the parameters of other people’s fears, capacities and concerns. Instead, strip away those well-intentioned opinions, ignore what other folks in your industry are already doing, and reconnect with your unique passions and desires. What’s a resounding yes to you and only you?

This journey of mine is far from perfect and is quite riddled with moments of fear or anxiety. What I remind myself is that my body and mind are designed to keep me safe and alive. My brain will repeat patterns because it can predict the outcome, even if said habits or routines don’t benefit me in any way. On the other side of this discomfort and this tiptoeing outside my realm of “normal” is a new era, is me levelling up.

Allow this winter season to be a point of clarity and homecoming. If you’re ready to dive in, then leap. But if you need more time to let your brain percolate, then do that. You know you best.

I’ll leave you with this tidbit from my bookclub, where we were discussing how to become more confident versions of ourselves. One woman remembered this quote, which I will roughly recall now: Stop thinking of yourself so much. Now, I know this seemingly contradicts everything I just said, but the meaning is more around those external eyes. Stop worrying about what others will think, stop limiting yourself for fear of judgement or ridicule. No one is thinking of you as much as you are.

Let freedom reign and create the freakiest shit.

Make sure to tag me when you do, that kind of work inspires me so very much. I cannot wait to witness your creations and meet you in your element.

xx Lauren

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TOP RESOURCES

Cycle charting is the practice of journaling how you’re feeling mentally, physically and spiritually each day with the hope of discovering monthly patterns in your behaviour and emotions, as dictated by your menstrual cycle.

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"The more I dive into this place, the more I find comfort in the uncomfortable, the more I begin to notice the shifts in my mental landscape. How my mind, my body, and my spirit react to these creative endeavours differently week by week..."

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